Sunday, December 25, 2011

is it good to be a single child?

i started to think about some of my behaviours after reading a post. yes, only reading can make us write. the matter is that, i talk to myself a lot, in my home, outside home too.. as i brought up alone i used to talk to myself, to my diary, to the mirror, sometimes to the person who doesnt exist anywhere around me. i remember, from childhood i used to imagine situations that shall happen in recent times and i create the whole dialogues that i have to tell when that situation occurs. :) but that help me most times., but not always.
my colleague told me that when i walk on road, my face explains that i am thinking so deeply. and am just out of mind. yeah true.. i think a loooot, mostly when i walk alone. i told here before that am not am singer, but i love to sing and i do that in mind, i sing a lot, and sometimes i cannot control that interest and then the song will burst out of my mouth.. and the sad part is that, it always happen when am travelling, or walking.. soo sad.. then i'll start think of the people around me, poor people.. hei dont think i sing loudly.. noo. slow.. bt people can understand that my mouth is moving and am not on fone or something.. so they may feel am mad!!
why all this happen in me?.. may be am brought up as a single child.. sometimes, it hurts when my friends talk about their siblings and all that... but the same thing make me happy sometime.. when am home, i get complete attention of my parets, i dont have to share their love, or anythng.. when they bring something home, i dont have to give to anyone. am i being selfish??.. oh God, no.. when am with friends, i love to give them alll that.. but the matter is that noone is demanding me to give this or that..
but girls shouldnt born or brought up lonely.. my life taught me that.. sometimes, the lonely feeling makes me mad...

Tuesday, December 13, 2011


He was charming,
naughty, so loveable.
He was the love of
a family.
He always care about
his hair, beard.
new styles, new looks.
he was fantastic.

but last time, when i saw him,
he was laying on a bench,
covered with white clothes.
His head was half damaged,
no new look,
no beard,
no smile in his lips.
no pain also.

His loved one's told me
with tears ..
look, its not him.
its not him.