lately...

it happend. i got specs.. dr told me to use it continuosly for about 6months. :)
i cannot think that am alone again.
but its true.
life is not so simple like we think.. ups and downs.. am fed up.

Seasons..

Again its a muzzy day. Morning,i decided to clean up my book shelf. It contained a lot of books unarranged and i got my 10yr old pen collection from that. I was really hesitated to threw out my stuffs, and luckily most of the pens had no ink and i so dump it today.oho.. feeling sad.:(

Before some days, a point was discussed about behavioural changes in rainy season. I donno how many persons felt that. my friend told me that he have 2 characters, and feel so calm and talk sweet and write a lot in this time. and rest of the time, might not be feeling the same. But i felt its true.
From my observation, i found out a similar behavioural change. Not much behavioural. But somewhat similar to that. i love to write a lot in rainy season. Matter and subject is not at all an important factor in these times. Besides that, i just love to be wrapped by my red blanket and sleep all the day,closing all windows for making a dark in the room. And so, reading will be very less. Since school days, i easily fell asleep if i start reading in night. But that phenomenon was just for study texts. And i dint like to sleep in after noon like all other do. But in rainy season, the cold make me sleep all the day. I know, u may be feeling it usual or my writing as bull shit.!!!
But think, Why is that so?

How a rain can make changes in people?..
Seasons affect people.. mh.. needs a proper research. :)

ME.!

When someone asked me to select the way that i like, i always sat with a shameless face. Its been like this always.

I am 22 and everyone think that i should have an aim to which i extend my dreams. But unluckily, i dont have any. It just varies from this to that with any of the surroundings or situations around me.

Sometimes, i love to become a dancer eventhough i dint dance anywhere outside my room. even i cannot named it as a dance. and i love to study moree and more and collect a lot of degrees/certificates eventhough i hate to write exams. what to ddo?.. none will give degrees without writing some stupid exams.

Latest is, to start a restaurant.b'coz my first and foremost interest is to cook and eat. mh.........I love it. and the one hidden fact behind is, even the owners of the restaurants will not be ready to eat the food they serve in my city.Am not telling it about all restaurants. but, around 95%.

ha.. likewise, my interest change from this to that.

Now i've completed my post graduation. But still yet, my life was just flowing. I selected one subject in HS. and then reached a very different topic in graduation. then also, i did my post graduation in a subject i've never thought of till the end of my graduation. I dono how i am like this.. why i spend life like this.. without much try to explore the future, i reached here. so i think, this will continue and i shall reach somewheree i never thought of.

for some 3 days, am feeling pain behind my eyes. One of my friend told me that i shall have to wear specs. I always loved to wear it since my childhood. but before 2,3weeks my friend told me that i'l look bad with specs. so i changed my mind. i dont want it now. mm.. am tensed to go to a eye specialist..i dont want specs...

experiencing another rainy season

i was finding a place to hide,

yeah, from me.

I am enjoying the heavy rain.. where else i can see the most beautiful rain than this. its continuously raining.

and my most beautiful interest it to see the rain, but sometimes, like to be inside home by closing all the doors and windows. but can see the rain through the windows even it is closed. and, reading in that dim light. I donno why i feel to do so.

yeah, its flood over here. almost all over here. so i think, the rain is beautiful only within here. outside, people are struggling. road sides are fully flooding, so its difficult to get out. and i find the something interesting here is that most people hate to get wet in rain.. why?

ഒരു മഴ പറഞ്ഞിട്ട് പോയത്

ഒരു മഴയില്‍ അങ്ങ്‌ തൊടിയില്‍
നിന്റെ പ്രണയം നീരാട്ട്‌ നടത്തിയതും
മയങ്ങിക്കത്തുന്ന മെഴുകുതിരികളെ
നീ ശപിച്ചിറക്കി വിട്ടതും
മഴയുടെ കുളിരില്‍ ‍
രാത്രി ചുവപ്പ്‌ പട്ടില്‌ മൂടിയതും
ഞാനോര്‍ക്കുന്നു.
ഒടുവിലീ മഴ നിന്നെയവഗണിച്ചെന്നെ
സ്വന്തമാക്കവേ
തിരിഞ്ഞ്‌ നോക്കാനാവാതെ
ഞാനിറങ്ങുന്നു

. . .

മഴയുടെ ഇരമ്പലില്‍
ചില കണ്ടുപിടുത്തങ്ങളിലാണ്‌
മുറ്റത്തെ ചെമ്പകം.
നിന്‍റെ വിയര്‍പ്പിന്‌
വസന്തത്തിന്‍റെ രുചിയും,
നിന്റെ ചൂടിന്‌
ശിശിരത്തിന്റെ കുളിരും
ഈ മഴയ്‌ക്ക്‌ നമ്മുടെ നിറവുമുണ്ടത്രേ,
കാലങ്ങളോരോന്നായ്‌
നമ്മില്‍ മാറി മാറി നിറയവേ,
ചെമ്പകങ്ങള്‌‍‍‌ പുതിയ നിറം
നമ്മില്‍ കണ്ടുപിടിക്കുന്നു

നീ മാത്രം

എന്റെ പ്രണയം കടലും കരയും കടന്ന്
ആകാശവും ഭൂമിയും കടന്ന്
നിന്നിലായ് മാത്രം ഭവിക്കട്ടെ!


കാറ്റേൽക്കുന്ന നെൽക്കതിർ പോലുടൻ
ഞാനാർദ്രയായ് തീരട്ടെയതിന്റെ
യുണർവിൽ നിനക്കായ് ഞാൻ
സ്വപ്നങ്ങളുടെ കണ്ണിചേർത്ത്
പ്രണയം കൊരുത്തുതരാം.

06/30

i dont care to be a mad,
if ur with me to take care of.
i dont care to die,
if u fill top of my grave with fresh flowers
everyday.

i donno how to express my love,
how to hide my love,
i dont want you to know.
because, thats the only way to
move away from me.

each turn of the street give me
a feeling of your existence.
am expecting to see you on each roads,
each streets.
mad me!
mad you!